Die, die, die my darling!!

Die, die, die my darling
Don't utter a single word!
Die, die, die my darling
Just shut your pretty eyes
I'll be seeing you again
Yeah, I'll be seeing you, in HELL!!!

Before you get surprised as to why such a start to the blog , let me explain. Picture this, you have had a hard day at work. Things just did not go your way at office, you come home to believe that things wont go wrong furthermore and as you open the door you find....

Weeping bahus, monstrous saas and a huge gang of not-so-good-looking females scheming against each other.

How would you feel? Where would you go? When would the torture end? How would you convince your roomie to switch the channel and make her believe that there are other interesting things happening in the world? How? How? How?

So the torture starts at generally 7.30 pm and ends by 9.30.
Disclaimer : The synopsis of these serials has been done on the viewership time of 1.5 months and any discrepancy from the main story is purely because of lack of following and pure disinterest.... :-)

Time : 7.30 pm
Serial Name : Dulhann (Double N for Numerology)
Torturers : Vidya, Sagar, Sindura
Plot: Vidya is an illiterate who is married off to Sagar(bewildered and lost most of the time) who has a step sister named Sindura scheming to kill off her step bro Sagar and grab the "karodo ki jaaydaad"!!
Why it kills me: Lousy plot and hapless acting followed by superstitions. The other day an episode showcased a "baba" telling vidya that the following 3 days would be very tough on her "stupid" hubby. So what does our powerpuff girl do? She draws a "Sindoor ki laxman rekha" outside her room and asks her pati dev not to cross it. That scene almost killed me!!! I felt claustrophobic and giddy thinking how would my poor sagar stay in his room for 3 days, who would feed him, will he be saved ... err... no...I felt like punching in the face of the director for showing such superstitious behaviour on part of the characters.Do these people even realise where the world is progressing and what these people are showcasing in their serials???? Koi toh connection rakho!!!

Time: 8.00 pm
Serial Name: Kasamh Se ( Kasamh??????, spelling mishtake!! )
Torturers: Bani, Mr. Walia
Plot: Not worth mentioning. Same old run of the mill story. Philandering hubby avenged by too-sweet-to-be-real wifey. Hubby realizing his mistake and coming back to wifey and just when we think their problems are over and they might "live happily ever after", a new group of people starts plotting against them, esp the wifey!!! Hai re abala nari, kitni mushkil hai zindagi tumhari!!!
Why it kills me: The hero is too fat...simple!!! :-) On a serious note, why does wifey have to be shown so meek and timid all the time? The director commits the same mistake of showing the age old set up.

Time: 8.30 pm
Serial Name: Saat Phere ka safar (Something of that sort)
Torturers: Saloni, Nahar Banna
Plot: Yeah, the family is rajasthani in this case, so every character ends with a 'sa' like ma - sa, bhabhi- sa.. I got to know from my friend that Nahar Banna is into his 3rd marraige with saloni now. So, as you see i could not fathom much about this serial except that Saloni and Nahar Banna, both simply cannot act.
Why it kills me: It doesnt kill me much, because I am too busy getting slow poisoned with the food made by our maid at that time. :-)

Time: 9.00 pm
Serial Name: Betiyaan (Some subtext followed it , but sadly i do not remember it now)Torturers: I know only faces from this serial, no names except one called Hasmukh bhai.
Plot: "Betiyaan toh paraya dhan aur baap pe bojh hoti hai re, pushpa!!!" No, this is not a line from this serial but a one-statement synopsis of it.
What it kills me for: Good marathi actors acting in this one trying very hard to get their Hindi diction right. No matter how much they try, the marathi accent invariably surfs up now and then and it always kills me. Moreover, hasmukh bhai(whom i found out is a side character and not a main one) is shown so weepy that you wonder who named him hasmukh bhai in first place. Forced humour, any one?

So, at the end of this torture , I have absolutely no mood to switch and change the channel and reduce the aftermath of these serials.
I wonder many times, what is the purpose of these serials? Do they truly provide any entertainment value? The people shown in here are always black or white. Why cannot people have shades of grey which actually is a fact. No one is too good or too bad in real life also.
Why do the women have to be shown always scheming against each other and the men either absolutely dumb or perpetually philandering?
I agree to the fact that these serials have revived TV as a powerful media, spawned a multi crore industry, generated employment, given a second lease of life to the flop heroes of bollywood but have they realised at what cost this all came for?

These serials are being discussed as hot topics over the dinner table. What happened to politics, sports or other things that happen for real? Why is there such a big hue n cry over "Mihir Virani" dying and people calling up Ekkttaa KKapoorr( I don't know what's right according to her numerology) and asking him to bring back? Was he for real? No!

I can truly sympathise with men coming home tired from work only to see their wives glued to the TV set, totally involved in these painfully agonising soaps. And the channel change is strictly banned too!!! Poor souls!!!

My concern is people are too soon forgetting that what happens in those serials is not a reality. The line between fact and fiction is soon becoming a blur. Don't let that happen!!

Life is much more bigger and brighter than the world they show in these soap operas!

So, next time you see any K-serial or any poor imitation of it,, switch of the TV set, make a nice cup of coffee and do something meaningful. Believe me, it will be worth it!!!
And also, say a prayer for makers of all these serials because I am not going to stop chanting......

Die, die, die my darling!!!! :-)

Now, will somebody please explain all this to my beloved roomie???